Tuesday, May 11, 2010

A work in progress...

So I've really been inspired lately, and I love it. Songs and lyrics keep flying through my mind, so much that I can't keep up. Thank. you. God. I was always so afraid to write my lyrics down on a piece of paper, because they reveal the most vulnerable parts of me. I put down everything I'm feeling, and it's impossible for me to do otherwise. While I will admit, I do listen to some artists who sing about senseless things that are of no importance to me, I can't sing it. Technically..I "could", but it would feel wrong. Now writing is a big insecurity of mine. I can do it, but I'm not sure if it's any good. It means a lot to me, but who's to say it'll make sense to anyone else. What if it IS really good? These are the thoughts that flood my mind. *sigh* So I've decided. Just do it. That's right Nike, just do it. I'm proud to say that I've written 13 songs now. That's a whole album! I have things to say, and I'm socially retarded. as much as I want to say something, I can't make it work, the words come out jumbled, and in response I normally get a confused look. I've studied people for a long time, I've tried mirroring their actions, conversations, etc. It works very well in a work setting, but in a casual outing..I'm hopeless. This is why I love music. I can say everything I want and more on a piece of paper. At the same time, I'm horrified for the people I know to read my thoughts. Everything I think stays up here *points to head*. I'm not really one to get into my emotions with people, so now they will see what's actually ticking up there. My songs are a bit darker, some are arguments, some are me questioning what is wrong, some are my love for my husband and children. Music makes me feel like a human being, and I love that. Mark my words. I will be the person that at least one girl will be listening to one day, and she will be inspired to find her voice, and go for her dreams.

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